Eggcitement

IT'S HAPPENED!  ONE OF THE GIRLS HAS LAID AN EGG!  I got home from work and went into the garden for a bit of a chat with the chickens.  I was giving them a little bit of corn and we were having a pep talk about when they were going to start producing anything other than poo.  The husband was displaying his chicken whisperer technique to great success.  Although I had already checked the nest boxes in the morning I decided to have another look prompted by a eggquiry from hubby.  And lo, look at this little beauty...

And the key word here is little.  Spot our egg amongst this lot...

In other news the Salad Queen has been busy.  She has harvested her first cucumber (tasted great despite manky leaf disease) and created a bread roll spider for our last rainy barbecue.  Don't ask - its just how we spend time here at Chateau Madhouse.

One last question: any suggestions for splitting one egg five ways?





Black Dog

Churchill used to call his depressions his "black Dogs" (and, indeed, I believe Led Zeppelin have a fine track entitled Black Dog too).  Sadly, our Bix is currently in his own black dog, or funk, or depression (whatever you will).  At the weekend something happened - we are not sure what - and he ended up with a nasty puncture wound in his tail.  Chances are that it was his sister in a bout of play fighting, but I could not say that with any certainty.  Here he is:

He really, really, hates that collar and since Monday has been in the most almighty "I'm fooken pissed off me" funk (to be said in a Geordie accent to ge tthe full effect).  Meanwhile, things continue to develop in the garden, irrespective of the rather indifferent weather we have been having.  In particular, the sweetcorn is coming along:

As I understand it (hah!) the top picture is the man bits and the lower picture is the tassel (for those who get the joke:  ya ya Rug Man give me some Tassel).

Elsewhere, the blueberries have being doing well, but are showing signs of being assaulted by the chickens (who are in robust health), the tomatoes are bushy but a bit short on flowers and the pumpkin is running rampant:

The Salad Queen has discovered the true flavour of radish:

On a less crunchy front, the Love in the Mist has finally begun to bloom:



And that's it for this week, I would post more, but much as I try to scale back the business of my life, it seems that there is never quite enough time for either me of The Wife to really get around to doing all the things we would like to do as opposed to all the things that we have to do.  The good thing is that time will come at some point :)

The chickens have just been ushered off to bed and I am going to go and listen to Radio 4 on a momentous day in UK politics with the BSkyB bid being pulled.  Long live democracy, even our cock eyed version of it.   The girls are on the sofa eating crisps and watching the Apprentice.  By some bizarre serendipity the task is something to do with pies.  Now (and she does like to keep her talents hidden) The Wife is an expert on Pie, and I have been saying to her that when Mastermind comes on again she should enter with Pie as her specialist subject.  She is not so sure, but watch this space.  I can just see her in that black chair in her diamond studded Jimmy Choo high heel Wellies waxing lyrical on Pie down the ages.

And the chicken names are...

I realise that readers out there (hello Els, Caroline and Welly) will be anxious to know the girls names. The youngest chose Paxo, the Salad Queen went for Versailles and Big Al went for Blucher.   The offspring are an electic bunch as you can see. 

Blucher

I'm sticking with The Girls.

Chickens in the House la la lalahhh!

Sorry it has been a while since the last post, but to put it mildly, there has been a lot going on.  First of all, last weekend, we went to the Smallholders Show at Ardingly.  It was a lovely summer's day and there was a great deal to interest us.  Besides the goats, sheep, rabbits, Llamas, ducks, geese and turkeys there were, of course, chickens.  Not just a few chickens, but hundreds of chickens in every conceivable shape and variety.

When we went over to Middle Farm a few weeks ago, the Salad Queen set her heart on Blue Haze (or Blue Belle).  Naturally, when we came across five fine looking Blues it was inevitable that we were going to go home with chickens that night.  So we set to buying feed and water hoppers, sawdust and hay.  Fully laden, we had our 3 chickens packed up in a box, carried by Big Al, and set off home to the accompaniment of gentle clucks (and occassional squawks as we went over sleeping policemen).  Safely home and tucked up in their coop for 24 hours, they became the focus of attention for all the other animals in the house:

As you can see, Big Al decided they needed a watchtower to protect them overnight.  Sunday morning, we let them out of the coop and into their run.  They were reluctant to emerge at first but they eventually plucked up the courage to come out:

Leaving them in the run, we went out for some lunch (as it was my birthday) and to get a Rhubarb and Blueberry plant for our fruit border.  On Monday evening, after we got back from work, we clipped their wings (one wing on each bird) which was a lot less dramatic than I thought it was going to be, there were some mild complaints from the hens at being picked up, but nothing more than that.

Having been clipped, last night they were able to get out and roam the garden:

As you can see, they are not adverse to getting up on the raised beds, which we shall have to so something about or else some of our precious veg will be dissappearing at a rate of knots.  They had a good roam about last night, although they were not keen on the squally showers we were having.  They tried a few grapes, pecked at the gravel, were not much interested in a snail and showed Ruby Cat who was boss.  All we then needed to do was then round them up at dusk:

Their combs are starting to colour up nicely and hopefully, in a couple of weeks or so, we shall have some eggs.  Today I have some jobs to do to tidy up the coop by hanging up their hoppers to stop them from making such a mess.  Other than that, they are settling in nicely.  So far, so good, as they say.

Meanwhile, our other project on the go is Roger, our VW Kombi.  Roge has been sat on the drive for the last 8 weeks going nowhere as his servo brake has done West.  After much to-ing and fro-ing, Roge is in the garage today and should be roadworthy again by the weekend.  Now then - do you think we can get  a coop in the Kombi for when we go on holiday?

Amber, the puppy (well, 7 months) was spayed yesterday, so is not quite feeling herself this morning, so it will be a gentle walk for her later (maybe once the rain has passed).  I also want to go and look at some vines - I read last night that grapes can prosper inside a conservatory (The Wife is not convinced) and to get some sand for the hens for their sand bath.  So, another busy but positive day.

Countdown to C Day

The exciting news is that the chicken coop has arrived after much deliberation and internet research.  We looked at all sorts of chicken houses; plastic (eglus and eco houses) and wooden.  Plastic was the early front runner because of the cheerful colours (yes aesthetics over substance every time if you are going to ask me to make the decision) and the easy cleaning factor.  However we couldn't find an eglu with a separate nesting box and one of the jobs that we envisage for the youngest and the Salad Queen is egg collection. A nest box with a separate lid seemed to be the most child friendly solution.  The eco hen houses were great but all appeared to have the nest box in the wrong position for where we wanted the house to go.

So then we went to middle farm and had a good look around the wooden coops on offer.  Eventually we decided the chicken shack was for us.

The girls have a nice bedroom with perch and the nesting boxes are at the back with a a separate lid.  They also have a run for to keep them safe when we are not around and cannot let them into the garden.  Youngest is fascinated with the ramp which I am sure she envisages as some sort of chicken slide.  On the floor we (that's the royal we you understand) have dug down and placed some wire (to stop foxes digging under) and a liner covered with wood chip. 

All we need now (apart from actual chickens) is names.  So far Simon has suggested Kiev and Nugget.  Against our better instincts we have decided to hand the chicken naming over to the offspring (on the basis that they were banned from naming the dogs and the cat due to our reluctance to yell Fluffykins in the park or back garden).  Watch this space for breaking news on chicken names...

Guests in the Garden

Wednesday rolls around again, which means another glorious day in the garden for me.  First up though, we took Our Youngest over to (potentially) her new school.  We are immensely proud as she, rather than throwing a wobbly, is genuinely excited about her assessment day.  We head home to a bit of light weeding and watering.

Now that the garden is broadly settled it has started to attract all sorts of guests from the insect kingdom.

A welcome guest in the shape of a Ladybird

A butterfly on the Den windowsill

Ants on the face of a Sunflower

A Hover Fly takes off from the Broad Beans

Meanwhile the rest of the garden is making the best of the mixture of sunshine and showers we have had.



A corn kernel emerges

 

The cucumbers are coming along nicely

Sunshine

It's extraordinary what two days of sunshine can do to the garden.  Even the courgettes, which have not exactly been happy for some time, look happier this evening.  Yesterday, for the first time since we started cutting up the bottom half of the garden, we were able to actually just sit in the garden, just enjoying it for its own sake.  The Broad Beans are starting to be generous in size, the Salad Queen's leaves are blooming in productivity and the tomatoes are positively running wild.

Since I last posted, it has mainly been work that has taken up my time, and I was very disappointed on my day off last Wednesday to have spent much of my time eliminating a virus from the Salad Queen's PC.  This weekend, however, allowed me to catch up and more.  First thing Saturday I was in the Southern bed eradicating yet more bamboo, and it is while I was welly deep in roots and ivy that The Wife tottered out on her high heeled, Jimmy Choo special diamond encrusted Wellingtons to ask if I fancied a trip to Middle Farm http://www.middlefarm.com/ to have a look at Chooks?

Now, forgive your narrator's scepticism, but he knows the difference between a genuine enquiry and a de facto order, so I set aside the spade and fork and off we went.   Middle Farm is a great place to look at Chickens, and they sell Point of Lay, so it was not an entirely academic visit.  The Salad Queen took a fancy to Blue Haze and we also got a good look at some coops.

Back in the garden on Sunday, we enjoyed the fantastic weather.

I don't know what this tree is, prior to cutting back the bamboo it was hidden in a dank, dark corner of the garden.  Since we have cleared that corner out, it has come into its own, we lovely dark glossy leaves and little yellow buds.





It is good to just appreciate being outside sometimes.  We made ourselves comfortable in the shade at the end of the garden:

Anyway, all this frantic cutting back of bamboo and general clearing up of the area is because this is the area that we have been planning to place the coop in.  It was in the afternoon of Saturday that The Wife went on-line and now she has done it - the chicken coop and run are ordered and will be, all being well, with us this week.  After that, it will be the chickens - Blue Haze or Speckeldey?  We don't know yet, but we are all very excited.

Goodness knows what Ruby will make of it all.

And so it rained some more

Contrary to expectations the arrival of the water butts has precipitated (get it?) torrential rain showers.  Of course it is also Wimbledon so that may have something to do with it.  I honestly think that the first water butt that husband connected yesterday is full already.  This was no mere rain shower or even all day drizzle;  this was bounce back off the ground and soak you to the skin stuff.  It knocked out the internet connection (thats my story and I am sticking to it) and drowned out the tv that the sickly Salad Queen was watching.

It rained...

And it rained..

And it rained...

But it left everything all washed and new.

Rain

Ten days ago, we ordered via our local council at this site http://www.brighton-hove.gov.uk/index.cfm?request=c1109661 two rain butts and another compost bin.  I would like to give the council a big thumbs up for this initiative that provided us with a composter for £5 as opposed to the £30 odd quid you would spend in a garden centre.  A thoroughly deserved well done:

Naturally, since we ordered the water butts, it has been raining like a maniac until 3pm today, when they actually arrived.  We can now expect drought conditions across the southeast. I was hoping to get a lot done today, as Wednesday is my non working day, but shortly after taking Our Youngest into school the heavens opened.  The Wife, as previously mentioned, is now on Operation Chicken and I had planned to clear out the bed she has ear marked as the future chicken run.

However, the pouring rain did enable me to go upstairs and sort out the Salad Queen's computer, which yet again had a virus.  I had to do much of this by editing registry files, and it was not until 3pmm that I had finally cleaned everything up.  As it turned out, this was serendipitous, as I came downstairs the rain butts arrived and the skies cleared.

I quickly installed one rain butt:

We shall decide where the second will go this weekend.  I was then able to turn my attention to the lower south border, which has more than its fair share of bamboo.  I have made a reasonable start, and it has the very beneficial side effect of providing us with plenty of canes:

This is the cleared area, with bamboo still lining the southen fence, but much reduced.





This is the pile of canes we have stacked to one side of the shed and which, no doubt will come in handy in the future.



We are going to attend the South of England Smallholder's Show on 2nd/3rd July and will see whether we can pick up some hints and tips of Chicken care.  The Wife, even as I type, has her nose buried in The Urban Hen by Paul Peacock.  This one, clearly, is going to run and run.

Finally, to prove that the garden is not just about food (or, more recently, grubbing up roots) The Wife has been growing lovely Cornflowers:

And, it is still not raining.



The Face of Destruction

Look at that face.  Ignoring the fact that Ruby cat appears to be licking her own nose clean (ok is licking her own nose clean) you would not immediately think that you were staring into the face of destruction.  But contrary to appearances this is the face of single handed carrot destruction.  Every carrot sown has been carefully entombed in a mountain of soil so that the poor seedlings have no hope of finding the sunlight.  I can almost imagine her doing it and carefully wiping her paws to maintain their pristine snowiness.

That aside the garden is thriving but very little is ready to eat.  A friend joked that she heard we had gone self sufficient.  This would be true if we were living off salad.  Eldest daughter's plot is dedicated to salad items with a pansy border for show.  Beautiful and edible.  The salad leaves are going great guns and are so far the only crop which is really producing.  Eldest (or the Salad Queen as she will henceforth be known) is very keen to make a sandwich from her stuff (which includes some cucumbers in the conservatory).  We are a bit concerned about the cucumbers as according the packet if they become stressed they will produce male flowers.  We have been working very hard at keeping them relaxed and have particularly prevented them watching the T.V. pictures of wholesale cucumber destruction in Spain following the German e-coli outbreak.

Retrenchment

A relatively quiet day today, and certainly no activity worthy of a picture.  The Youngest bounded in this morning to give me my Father's Day card (note from The Wife: it was addressed to "bad" - mainly the problem with words is dispiriting but very occasionally you do have to laugh) and present and not much later Big Al came down with a bottle of beer.  Not a bad start to the day.  After taking the dogs out for a walk, I reversed the car into the drive and we dragged out an accumulation of garden rubbish to take to the recycling centre.

As I have previously mentioned, The Wife has got her heart set on getting some chickens, and we have been debating about where to site the hen house and the run.  We finally decided today on the far south border, which is currently overrun with bamboo.  The early evening was spent cutting back some of the more extravagant growth, but there is a great deal more work to do (further note from the Wife - the beer accompanied him to the garden).

We retired to the house to enjoy a lovely dinner, including freshly picked French Beans, the Broad beans we picked last night and salad from the beds.  I know it is a cliche, but it is extraordinary how good the fresh food tastes by comparison to its supermarket compatriots.

Pootering about between showers

This morning had a slightly unpleasant early start as I needed to get over to Canterbury to collect the eldest before 10am.  He has just completed his first year at Uni and today was throwing out of halls day.  Fortunately, it is about a one and an half hour trip each way, so we were back just before lunch.

The family had decamped to Our Youngest's school fair, so I pottered about the garden taking stock and putting off jobs I really should be getting on with.  There are quite a few of these, and when I noticed that The Wife had dutifully trimmed back the wisteria which was overrunning the den, I thought I better set to on one of them.

Our northen border currently has a raspberry and a gooseberry bush ensconced.  The plan is to add some fruit trees, probably two apple trees.  Before this can be progressed the rest of the northern border needs clearing out.  Unfortunately, that includes removing a palm tree.  I had already had removed a substantial portion of this tree a few weeks ago.  I take no pleasure in cutting a tree down, but this one was definitely on the way out, and to be honest I think I put it out of its misery.  However, it still need to be rooted out, and based on my previous experience of digging big stuff up I have been happily ignoring this job.

As any parent knows, the answer to the question "Are we there yet?" will depend on how many times you have been asked in the last five minutes and just how far you have actually travelled.  You know it is going to be a long journey when the refrain starts just as you pull out of the drive.  In like vein "Am I there yet" applies to rooting out a tree.  As I headed towards China I began to have serious doubts over my ability to get the end of this particular journey.  Here it is after about an hours digging and general grubbing about:

I could have done with a couple of yoked bullocks at this point to hoik the fucker out, but no such luck.  Anyway, suffice to say I perservered, mainly because I am a stubborn git.  Eventually I was able to get sufficiently underneath the roots to get the chainsaw on the stump, and things moved along relatively swiftly after that.  A patch of earth may be boring to look at, but this looks good to me, if only because of the singular absence of a tree stump:

Last week, a drought was announced for some parts of the East of England.  Naturally since then it has poured down.  Last night it rained so hard that rain was bouncing upwards from the decking to reach my knees.   However, the garden seems to be lapping it up, and the broad beans in particular are maturing nicely:

While I was waging war with the stump, Big Al came out to see what all the swearing was about.  As I have mentioned previously, he is very proud of his peas and he set about weeding with a gusto around them.  They are still small, but I think (given the love and attention they are getting) we can expect great things.  Here is one of Big Al's peas:

The Wife and family rolled home from their fair extravaganza, replete with cake and fizz, and joined me in the garden.  The Wife immediately set about tidying up the tomatoes, which are starting to get a bit leggy.  Lots of flower buds are starting to emerge and despite the disappointing weather we have had in June, I think we can expect a good crop:

It has been a day of sunshine and showers, but we even though we have been pootering about, we have made progress, it has been a good day.

By the way, I know that it is not obvious how you comment - you click on the bit that says  "comments 0" below the post and that will open a new dialogue box for you to put your comments in.  I would be grateful for any feedback on the blog.

Desert Island Discs

Just latetly, BBC Radio 4 have been inviting listeners to contribute to their Desert Island Discs programme.  In brief, on this programme, you are invited to list your ten favourite records and to say why those songs are significant to you.  I have loved this programme for many years and I have given a great deal of thought to what would be my ten records:

1.  We will Rock you - Queen

You've got mud on your face, you big disgrace, waving your banner all over the place...

This takes me straight back to my childhood when we were living in a council flat and had no more than two brass pins to rub together.  Although times were hard, it was still a good time.  It reminds me of my childhood friends and the incredible summer of 76.

2.  Suzanne - Leonard Cohen

Suzanne takes you down to her place by the river...

Laura was my first big love, and she was a great Leonard Cohen fan.  Although I have not heard this in years, just the thought of it takes me back to being 18 and being naively in love and thinking that the world was always going to be like it was then.

3.  Welcome to the machine - Pink Floyd

Welcome my son, welcome to the machine...

Almost unbelievably, this is the song I sung to my eldest on the night he was born.  I held him in my arms 20 years ago and sang to him as he slept when he was just a few hours old.

4.  Do nothing- the Specials

I walk and talk, do nothing...

And two years later, I danced around the front room with Big Al in my arms as I played this on the record player.

5.  Little Green Bag - George Baker

Turn to the left, turn to the right...

Dancing to the early hours of the morning at the Catfish Club with my beloved in the sultry heat.

6.  Song 2 - Blur

I got my head shaved...

When The Wife and I moved in together, one of the first things I bought her was a CD player.  She had a collection of Blur albums and the CD player had a disconcerting habit of turning itself on the in the middle of the night and playing cd's - weird, but they were almost always Blur songs.  Such a strong and happy memory.

7.  At last - Etta James

At last my love has come along, my lonely days are over...

Slightly out of sequence, but At Last is one of my all time favourite songs and reminds me of Northern Exposure, a Channel 4 programme in the 90's which I enjoyed immensely, but also love it because it is a song of  love and redemption.  When I met The Wife, this is the song that came to my mind.

8.  Szelerem - Hungarian folk song

Szelerem means love in Hungarian and this traditional folk song is a haunting tale of what love means to one person.  It describes empyting the sea with a spoon so that one can give the pearls on the sea bed to your love.  It reminds me of when I was separated from my beloved, and how much I owe to her and how much I love her.

9.  How I Wish you Were Here - Pink Floyd

How I wish, how I wish you were here, we are two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl...

I think, strictly speaking, you are not permitted the same group/musician twice, but this track is so true to itself, and is so evocative of how I feel when I am apart from those I love, that I have to include it. 

10.  Sorrow - Bowie

Hah - well, actually,  this is another track that I have always adored, it also (in a positive way) reminds me of my first wife, with her long blonde hair and eyes of blue.  It's not true that I only got sorrow.


What would be your 10 tracks?

Shed Love

Is it unreasonable to fall in love with a shed?  As my beloved has hinted I have formed a deep and abiding attachment to the shed.  It is currently my favourite room in the house thats not in the house if you see what I mean.
Until we moved here last September I had lived a largely garden free existence for 40 odd years (childhood excepted).  I'd done balconies, patios, roof terraces and window sills but not an actual garden.  And until we moved here last September until about Easter this year the garden was in the main an homage to decking.  The people who lived here before were seriously into low maintenance gardening.  So with the chopping up of the decking and the making of the beds came the need for a shed to store garden stuff in.
I could not have foreseen how I would fall.  Oh shed of my dreams! As I love a list (as beloved will confirm) let me list the ways in which I love thee:

1. The children and pets have no interest in the shed so....get this... everything stays put in it.  No tidying up after others!!
2. Its got its own chair by the door for watching the garden grow in the rain and for having a rest with a glass of pink wine when making an evening tour of inspection.
3. It has a picture of Steve McQueen and another of Louise Brooks in it.  Random but true.
4. This one is a bit embarrassing. I love how it smells. Enough said.
5. It has so many possibilities.  Apparently I could get a solar panel to produce shed electricity (shedtricity?) and then...kettle...laptop...fridge for pink wine...tv.  Or what about a wood burner.  Or a day bed.

Anyway enough shed eulogising.  I shall be away to my colour charts to check what colour I will be painting the shed.